Eleanor Yap
Selective mutism (SM) is an extreme form of anxiety disorder which severely affects a child’s ability to communicate and interact socially with others. Under certain circumstances, those with SM are unable to speak in situations where speech or communication is expected of them.
This inability is caused by severe anxiety levels in the nervous system. The body automatically shuts down and goes into “freeze” mode, and is beyond a child’s control. It is thought to be extremely rare, affecting about one child in 1,000. But a 2002 study in “The Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry” puts the incidence of SM closer to seven children in 1,000, making it almost twice as common as autism, according to an article from “The New York Times”.
In Singapore, the figures which are not publicly available are said to be low, as such there is no support available locally; more help is available internationally. “It is not a lack of support, but rather no support in Singapore,” explained Nigel Ng, who was diagnosed with SM as a young boy. He has suffered many setbacks but has overcome most of them, though he still struggles with the condition today.
He is determined to bring awareness to SM and has already done so through writing a book about his journey called “Silence is not golden”. However, he is not stopping there – he recently started a social enterprise called DoorSING (the abbreviation stands for his book), which opens a “door” to a safe and inclusive space for self-discovery and creative expression for those with SM. The team behind the organisation also includes Nigel’s mother, Janet Wong (read Janet’s story HERE).
Said Nigel, “It is about discovering who we are. Those with SM can share and with no judgment.” DoorSING plans to hold monthly events for those with SM to share their passions, be it singing, cooking or writing.
The organisation also provides much-needed support to those with SM and their caregivers through a Whatsapp chat group and a Facebook closed group. Shared Janet, “If you have a child with SM, it is important to be compassionate, understanding and empathetic. Encourage and support your child to take little steps towards progress and don’t forget to praise his or her efforts. Do not pressure your child to speak, and do not yell, shout or speak in a harsh or aggressive tone.”
To further understand what SM is, here are five myths about the condition from DoorSING:
MYTH #1: Children with SM choose not to talk.
FACT: Children with SM can’t choose when to talk or not. “Selective” in SM means the child is literally unable to speak or respond in some places, with some people and in some situations.
MYTH #2: Children with SM are shy.
FACT: Shyness is a character trait; shy people have a choice to speak or not and can do so even when they are uncomfortable. In contrast, children with SM do not have a choice; the anxiety is so overwhelming that speaking is not an option.
MYTH #3: SM is ordinary anxiety.
FACT: SM is an anxiety disorder; it is a psychiatric condition. The situation is similar to clinical depression, which is a psychiatric condition that affects a person’s mood in the long term and not just ordinary, passing sadness.
MYTH #4: SM is similar to autism.
FACT: The factors causing communication impairment are different; for SM it is severe anxiety, while for autism, it is neurological and developmental issues. Autism impairs communication in all circumstances, while SM impairs communication in certain circumstances.
MYTH #5: Children with SM are stupid.
FACT: They may not be able to speak and express themselves, but they fully understand what people are saying.
** To join the DoorSING, reach out to Nigel at nigeldoorsing@gmail.com.
